The Grammys are here once again. You’ll be watching… because it’s an award show and America loves award shoes. I’ll be watching… because I’ll DVR the new Sunday night line-up on MTV and watch it later. Since we’ll all be watching, why not watch it together? Tune in here at 8pm and join me while I live blog the 51st Grammy Awards.

7:58 – Welcome readers. Anyone know who’s hosting?

8:02 – U2 opens the show…a treat for some, not for me. Woof.

8:04 – Whitney Houston, lookin’ purdy and flashin’ some leg. Not great at reading though…

8:05 – She might be a robot…

8:07 – J. Hudson’s dress is looks pretty uncomfortable with that bib in the front.

8:08 – I smell what your cookin’ Rocky and I don’t like it one bit… neither does Katie Perry.

8:10 – Okay Rock, get off the stage… you just buttercupped me that Neil Diamond and Weezie would be performing together.

8:12 – The writers of this show are pretty terrible. JT looked in pain reading those lines. Samberg shoulda hooked him up.

8:14 – I’m not feelin’ this performance right now and it’s giving me the time to think about if live blogging the Grammys is sad…

8:15 – It is.

8:21 – Took that last commercial break to reheat some chinese food.

8:22 – Ulgh, I do not like this Coldplay song. I hope they bring Jay-Z out.

8:23 – Boom. Called it. Spit it HOVA.

8:24 – And somewhere Joe Satriani is turning off his television.

8:28 – Not a fan of country music. I will watch Carrie Underwood though. She’s purdier than Whitney.

8:29 - Her drummer needs to pull up those pants a little… or the camera man needs to get a new shot.

8:31 – She’s got the second bedazzled, decorated microphone of the night… I wonder how many there will be?

8:32 – I’m pretty sure Sheryl Crow hates the song “All I Wanna Do”

8:34 – Sugarland wins for some country award I don’t really care about. Sounds like a good song though…

8:37 – Lincoln commercial – Chan Marshall has an awesome voice.

8:40 – What did Duffy win for already? I missed that one…

8:41 – Didn’t like that rendition of “Bridge Over Troubled Water”

8:42 – Coldplay’s taking this one…

8:42 – Boom. Called it. Somewhere Joe Satriani is opening a bottle of gin.

8:43 – Kid Rock… CUT THE MULLET!

8:45 – Kid Rock incorporates his mug shot into his song. I do not like this song. Not at all. Play “Bawidaba”

8:46 – And I just threw up in my mouth a little. Worst Song Of The Year

8:47 – Who gave Kid Rock this much time to perform?

8:53 – IT’S MILEYYYYYY! And Taylor Swift. And an intriguing looking guitar… I wonder if it’s a Taylor.

8:55 – This is exactly how my high school career went.

8:57 – Pop Collaboration With Vocals: Robert Plant and Alison Krauss

9:00 – One hour in. Welcome back to the stage Jennifer Hudson.

9:03 – Tear jerker.

9:09 – Jason Mraz, lookin’ sharp. He’s about to get upstaged though by the Jo Bros

9:10 – Oh dip, Jo Bros and Stevie Wonder!

9:12 – “Superstitious” niceeeee

9:14 – The Jo Bros have arrived

9:14 – Good thing there’s no host, Ryan Seacrest would probably try and high-five Stevie.

9:15 – Blink is back. Holla! Now let’s hear a new album.

9:16 – How did Travis, with arm in sling, end up as the one who rips the envelope?

9:16 – Best Rock Album: Coldplay – “Viva La Vida Or Death And All His Friends”

9:22 – Craig Ferguson livens up the show with some of his own writing, which is actually humorous.

9:23 – Katy Perry performs. Odds on her actually kissing a girl?

9:25 – Katy Perry wins  award for best impression of the Chiquita Banana lady.

9:27 – Kanyeezy takes the stage! Decorated microphone in hand. Shoulda seen that one coming. That’s 3.

9:28 – How many minutes until ‘Ye takes the spotlight and cues the auto-tuner?

9:30 – Best New Artist: Adele. I’ve never heard a single song by Adele… but she’s got an awesome voice.

9:36 – They are now 6 minutes into The College Humor Show on MTV and I’m missing it. There better be something worthwhile coming up on the Grammys.

9:36 – Like Morgan Freeman. I’d love to get an intro from him.

9:37 – BUTTERCUP! Kenny Chesney performs. I regret not watching The College Humor Show.

9:41 – Just watched four minutes of The College Humor Show. Laughed six times. Awesome.

9:42 – Record Of The Year: Robert Plant and Allison Krauss – “Please Read The Letter”

9:48 – Here we go. Swagger time.

9:49 – Oooo MIA performs… if you can call it a performance

9:50 – Kanye, Jay-Z, Lil Wayne and TI perform. Color disappears.

9:51 – Wayne’s not getting enough camera time. Doesn’t matter though, Jay-Z just killed it. Chuch.

9:53 – I think they shut MIA’s mic off…

9:54 – Kate Beckinsale on stage. Stop traffic. Here comes Sir Paul.

9:55 – Paul McCartney performs. Dave Grohl joins him. Ringo wonders why.

9:56 – “I Saw Her Standing There” to open, he’s going to move chronologically through The Beatles/Wings catalog.

9:58 – Or not. One song. Kid Rock performs longer than Paul McCartney. Negative points for the 51st Grammy Awards.

10:01 – New commercial for M&M’s with the talking M’s. They changed the voice of the yellow one to a big dumb idiot, ala Patrick from Sponge Bob. Terrible.

10:03 – Somebody let Jack Black perform.

10:04 – Is he really married?

10:05 – They’re just giving out Lifetime Achievement Awards tonight, aren’t they?

10:06 – Best Male Pop Vocal: John Mayer- “Say”

10:06 – Annnddddd the broadcast drops out.

10:07 – LL is King. And it looks like I’ll finally get to hear an Adele song.

10:09 – This Sugarland song would sound a lot better with strings behind it.

10:13 – I hope Sugarland gets really popular so that Amy Poehler can do an impression of the girl-half when she eventually hosts SNL.

10:18 – Paltrow. Question: Where’s Chris Martin?

10:19 – Answer: taking notes on Radiohead’s performance. “Note to self: Get marching band” -Chris Martin

10:22 – Those tubas are awesome. This is a sick performance.

10:28 – Sam Jackson can really project.

10:29 – Justin Timberlake performs. Ladies swoon. TI is there too. I hope Andy Samberg shows up.

10:30 – TI cussed, 5 second delay saves the day.

10:32 – I wonder if those drummers are the same guys who drummed for Kanye’s “Love Lockdown” debut.

10:34 – Apparently we just heard the theme song to TI’s new reality show.

10:36 – I don’t like politics with my music. Who let this lobbyist in here?

10:40 – Tribute to the Four Tops wit Smokey Robinson, Neo and Jaime Foxx.

10:47 – Neil Diamond performs “Sweet Caroline,” Boston goes nuts except he turned it into a spoken word and it sucks.

10:48 – It’s unclear if the audience doesn’t understand the call and response portion of the chorus or if they are too displeased with this rendition to sing along.

10:54 – Tribute to the late grate Bo Diddley featuring BB King, Buddy Guy, Keith Urban and John Mayer.

11:02 – Here comes Wayne… with Alan Toussaint and Robin Thicke to remember/pay tribute to New Orleans after Katrina.

11:05 – Wayne’s got some fresh kicks. They look like space boots… which is weird because Gary Sinise, who stars in my favorite movie, Apollo 13, introduced him.

11:08 – Wayne just killed it with Alan Toussaint and the Dirty Dozen Brass Band. Almost as good as Radiohead.

11:09 – will.i.am gets on my nerves. Why couldn’t they just hologram him in from somewhere else?

11:11 – Best Rap Album: Lil Wayne – Tha Carter III. Well done Weezy, well done. You deserve it for that performance alone.

11:18 – Zooey Deschanel – She came to introduce.

11:19 – Robert Plant and Alison Krauss perform. I’d prefer more Wayne at the moment.

11:23 – Green Day on stage to close this baby out and let us know that Rick Rubin is the Producer of the Year. Can’t argue with that.

11:24 – Album Of The Year: Raising Sand by Robert Plant and Alison Krauss. I’m definitely not the only one who thought the “r” noise coming out of Billy Joe Armstrong’s mouth was going to be “Radiohead.” It should have been.

11:27 – Stevie Wonder back on stage to sing us out.

11:30 – I can’t help to think that these people would not be leaving during the middle of his performance if he wasn’t blind. No?

11:31 – Well that’s that. Done and done. I liveblogged the hell out of these Grammys. Excuse me while I take the rest of the night to decide whether or not I find that disappointing and sad. Where’s my DVR?